“You pray for us to get in trouble?!?!” my kids asked in wide eyed disbelief?  “No,”  I explained, “I don’t wish for you to get in trouble.  However, we all make mistakes.  It’s easier and better to learn from them when we are young.  So, if there are issues that need to addressed, I pray that God allows them to be uncovered so your daddy and I can help teach you through them.”

This discussion was in response to my commenting that a lie that had been discovered was an answer to prayer.  The issue of honesty in my children had been heavy on my heart because I could see one of my kiddos tending in the direction of dishonesty.  I began to fervently pray that God would give me and Tim clear opportunities to address the issue and for the Lord to work in the child’s heart.  The timing couldn’t have been more perfect for the incident.  Tim had just finished up jury duty and the judge shared with the panel that he had recently sentenced a woman to 14 days in prison for lying.  Had she told the truth, she still would have been fined, but spared the prison term.  Tim explained to the kids that it’s similar for us with parenting them.  If they do something wrong, there will be a consequence.  However, if they do something wrong and try to cover it up with a lie, the consequence will be multiplied many times.  

We asked the kids whether they thought we were being loving or mean by teaching enforcing these values.  The jury example helped them connect that we love them enough to help them learn these things now, in order to spare them harsher consequences as adults.  As far as honesty goes, Luke 16:10 (see below) is in frequent discussion at our home.  Whether we can trust them in piddly little things that they might be tempted to think are no big deal, determines whether we can trust them later on with babysitting, driving, etc.  Their choices do indeed have short and long term consequences. 

Grace.  After a heavy discussion like this, I appreciated that Tim reminded the kids that we know they are going to make mistakes (we still do!) and that we will always love them (and so will God)…no matter what! 

Save me, O Lord, from lying lips and from deceitful tongues.
Psalm 120:2

Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much,
and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much.
Luke 16:10

Honest is the best policy.
(There’s disagreement in research about who said this first.)