“I can’t get that picture out of my head!”

This was the lament of one of my carpool kids one morning on the way to school.
He was referring to a photo of his sister’s removed tonsils.  Ha, I can only imagine!

What a great teachable moment!

We talked about how what we look at can stick with us and continue to impact us.  He still grimaced as he talked about the picture he had seen a couple of years prior. 

This is the very reason we want to guard our eyes from sinful things and are careful about what we watch on television, movies, video games, and computers.   There are good reasons we parents have rules about such things!  🙂

It was also a great chance to remind them that if anything they know is wrong pops up on a computer to look away quickly and let an adult know immediately!

I couldn’t think of a related Bible verse right away, so I asked if they could.
These aren’t Biblical, but they are wise…

*  One kid said that it reminded her of the preschool song, “Oh, be careful little eyes what you see.”

*  Another one thought of the funny monkeys and their “hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil” hands.

I loved how those comments contributed to the overall discussion.  It’s always amazing to hear how kids interpret and connect things.

On the way home from school, I followed up with this verse and talked about how our eyes are sticky.  Meaning, we can’t “unsee” things.  The images stick with us and impact our lives.

From Jesus’s Sermon on the Mount –
“The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!”
Matthew 6:22-23

Do your kids know that their eyes are sticky?

If you want to know more about teachable moments, how to look for them, and what to do when one happens, see the first few pages of your copy of
Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments.

Being content certainly makes all-year-long Thanksgiving easier.  So what’s the secret?

The portion of the verse “I have learned the secret of being content” was floating around my head the other day and made me realize I needed to check the passage to make sure I knew what the secret is!

How many of us are familiar with both Philippians 4:12 and Philippians 4:13 separately, but have never tied those two together in our heads?  Please tell me I’m not the only one!

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do all this through him who gives me strength.  Philippians 4:12-13

Try this discussion at your next family meal or devotional time:
 
1- Ask your kid if he knows the secret of being content and read Philippians 4:12-13.

My kids easily learned this verse from the Seeds Family Worship: Power of Encouragement CD we listen to in carpool every Wednesday.  You can hear a sample of the song, buy the CD, or download the single MP3 through the link.  Also, you can read here about how to incorporate Scripture through music into your drive time.

2 – Discuss ways your family members struggle to be content. 

3 – Now, read together this passage and discuss what Paul, the writer of Philippians, had been through.

*Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one.
*Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was pelted with stones,
*three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea,
*I have been constantly on the move.
*I have been in danger from rivers,
*in danger from bandits,
*in danger from my fellow Jews, in danger from Gentiles;
*in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea;
*and in danger from false believers.
*I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep;
*I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food;
*I have been cold and naked.
*Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches.
2 Corinthians 11:24-28

4 – Kinda puts things into perspective doesn’t it?!  If Paul can be content, surely we can too!

Are you going to ask your family if they know the secret of being content?
I bet you’ll have a great discussion!

Click here or on the image if you are interested in purchasing this beautiful wall art or similar items from Wise Décor.

For more verses, discussion questions, and Take Action ideas on the topic of “Contentment,”
see your copy of Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments.

How to make them:
*Find  some spare change.
*Tape the coins individually to index cards.  You can make as many as you wish.
*On the other side of the index cards, write ways to pray for our leaders.  Brainstorm as a family to think of ideas such as health, wisdom, growing walk with the Lord, wise counsel, safety, strong family, etc.
*Need more ideas for what to pray?  Use your copy of Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments to find topics and verses to pray for the President and leaders.

How to use them:
Younger children- 
Hide them and pray for each item as the child finds them.
Older children or teens –
Pass around the cards and each person lifts up the idea on his card.

Beyond President’s Day:
*Put the cards in a safe place so you can pull them out for ideas whenever you wish to pray for the leaders of our country.
*Visit the Presidential Prayer Team website and browse the many related to praying for our government leaders.  You may wish to join the prayer team to receive e-mails as reminders and with specific ideas for how to pray

I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness.
1 Timothy 2:1-2

Because of some of the sensitive wording in yesterday’s post, it seems that filters kept most people from receiving the e-mail version.

CLICK HERE if you’d like to read my thoughts on the whole “50 Shades” issue.

About a year ago, a friend’s mom asked her, “What’s this term “mommy porn” that I’m hearing about?  She is a mentor mom for a young mom’s group and was surprised that this was an issue that needed to be addressed.

As my friend and I discussed her mother’s question, we both immediately thought of the best-selling book, 50 Shades of Grey.  I had heard enough to know that I needed to stay away from it, but was having trouble understanding this question –

How had that level of content become so mainstream? 

About that time, a suggested book appeared on my Amazon page because it’s by one of my favorite parenting authors and I knew it would help me find the answer.  Pulling Back the Shades:  Erotica, Intimacy, and the Longings of a Woman’s Heart, by Dannah Gresh and Dr. Juli Slattery, deals with this subject from a Christian perspective.

After reading Pulling Back the Shades,
I think it’s important for Christians to be aware of the “Fifty Shades” genre for several reasons:
*Many (mostly women…of all ages) have been sucked into this genre and are as addicted as if it were visual porn.
*It absolutely can affect marriages, particularly in relation to unrealistic (fictional!) images of what men should be.
*We parents need to not duck our heads in the sand and pretend it’s not out there luring our preteen, teenage, college aged, single, or married daughters.  We need to encourage them to avoid it just as we would teach fleeing any other type of pornography.
*If you or anyone you know is struggling in this area, Pulling Back the Shades, could be a helpful resource.

Teachable Moment:
My tween daughter has seen us fast-forwarding through a preview of the upcoming Fifty Shades movies and asked about it.  I plan on using that as a launch pad for a teachable moment to discuss this issue at an age appropriate level.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
Proverbs 4:23

Being familiar with Scripture and helping our kids know how to regularly apply it to our lives, helps us in all areas of our lives!  My hope and prayer is that regular use of my book will help you remember look at all issues, such as today’s, from a spiritual standpoint. 
Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments

Here’s a fun and easy Valentine’s idea that can be nice decoration AND provide meaningful, parenting with Scripture style, teachable moments throughout the month of February!

LOVE TREE DIRECTIONS:
Assembling –
*Gather several bare branches and put them in a pitcher or vase.
*Cut out 16 hearts big enough to write a few words on.
*Punch holes in the tops of one of the sides.
*Use any type of ribbon or string to tie loops on them for hanging.
*Go ahead and hang all 16 hearts on the tree.

I used a cheap, but cute, plastic container, gathered the branches from outside, stuck them in floral foam in anchor them, then covered them in glass beads for a pretty way to weight them down.  (Use something other than the glass beads if you have little ones that put things in their mouths!)

Teachable Moments How-To:
*Each day, create teachable moment at your family meal time or family devotional time.
*Write one of the snippets of 1 Corinthians 13 (broken down below into 16 parts/days)
*Discuss it.  Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments is a good resource to help you with the discussion.  Look up applicable topics and see the “Discussion” portion. 

Modification for young children:
Make it your “Love is Kind” tree.  (1 Cor. 13:4)
*Each day, ask your child who God wants her to be kind to.
*Write that name on the heart.
*Discuss ways your child can be kind and loving toward that person.
OR…
*Each day, ask your child a way she can show kindness.
*Write that kindness attribute on the heart.
*As teachable moments come up throughout the 16 days, refer back to the “ways to be kind” that are on the hearts.

16 teachable moments for 16 days
1 Corinthians 13:4-8a 
Love is patient,
love is kind.
It does not envy,
it does not boast,
it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others,
it is not self-seeking,
it is not easily angered,
it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects,
always trusts,
always hopes,
always perseveres.
Love never fails.

For more Scripturally meaningful Valentine ideas, scroll down through these past blog posts.

HAPPY VALENTINE’S!

Do you live in a neighborhood or strangerhood?

Our pastor has often used the apt term “strangerhood” in referring to the way many streets have become.

If you are in a neighborhood where people know each other, are there for each other, and even have fun with each other, then count your blessings.

If you’re realizing that your block is more of a strangerhood, then consider being the catalyst for change!

We lived in our old neighborhood for 13 years.  For the first few years, we didn’t know very many neighbors.

Then, our subdivision had a rash of burglaries.

Our local police department encouraged us to develop a neighborhood watch program.  Because everyone was concerned about our neighborhood’s safety, there was heightened interest in getting to know one another.

I’m sad that it took a serious problem to bring us together, but thankful for the resulting relationships and connectivity.

Think about what your family enjoys & ways the kids can help and be a part. 
FOR US, that’s looked a number of different ways throughout the years:
* Baked holiday goodies dropped on doorsteps.  My kids love delivering them!
* Ice Cream Sundae Sunday party one summer evening.
* Neighborhood Night Out gatherings in a common area or our front yard.
* New Neighbor Welcomes.  For more, click here.
* Aaaaaaannnnnnnndddddd, our all time fave, the ANNUAL NEIGHBORHOOD GROUNDHOG DAY PARTY!

Yes, you read correctly.  Groundhog Day Party.  Why not?  Our family loves finding ways to celebrate and creating traditions.  So here we are 6 years later, continuing our neighborhood Groundhog Day Party and I’m about to run out of new ideas.  There are only so many ways you can get creative with these furry little critters and their shadows!

The purpose of this admittedly odd tradition is not to glorify rodents or predictions.  We express that it’s just silly fun.  Rather, we relish the bond it’s creating for our neighborhood families.  After all, not many kids will be able to say they grew up going to annual groundhog day parties!

This “groundhog” snack from last year isn’t the cutest idea out there.
But it certainly was the easiest because the kids made it instead of me = part of the fun!

It’s also helpful for me to remember that WE ARE THE CHURCH wherever we live.
Consider this verse…

From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth;
and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. 
Acts 17:26

Pretty awesome when you think about it, isn’t it?!
God has each of us uniquely where we are for a reason.

What is your family doing to help make where you live more of a neighborhood than a strangerhood?

For more verses on topics like hospitality, that can help you teach these principles to your kids, don’t forget to reference your copy of Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments.

You know your child better than anyone else.  You know his strengths and weaknesses.
What have you found to be his biggest temptation? 

You know,
…the one that is constantly rearing it’s ugly head!
…the issue that he gets in trouble for over and over and never seems to learn.
…the one that breaks your heart because you know he should know better and yet still struggles.
Yeah, that one.  We all have one or more.  Adults and kids alike.

So, what are you doing about it on behalf of your child? 
Are you
…pretending it’s not so bad?
…sticking your head in the sand and hoping it will just go away?
…at your wit’s end with trying everything you know to no avail?

OR,
Are you
…asking God to work in his heart in a way that nobody else can touch?
…praying topical Scripture on his behalf?  Resource:  Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments. 
…asking God for him to get caught at every turn so he has opportunities to learn while he is younger and the consequences are less harsh?
…petitioning the Lord to somehow use this weakness for His glory?

I love this verse that follows the “Armor of God” and
is listed in the “See Also” verses under”Prayer” in
Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.
With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. 
Ephesians 6:18
 Photo: Creative Commons – Google

Have you ever been at your wit’s end with your kid?

That’s a silly question.  Let me rephrase…

How many times have you been at your wit’s end with your kid?

I’ve found that too often it isn’t until after I’ve tried everything that I hit my knees and pray about the issue. 

Why do we neglect what we should do from the get go?
I’m not sure, but after so many rounds I can say that I’m finally starting to remember to go to the Lord sooner rather than waiting until I’m out of human options!

Years ago, I asked a godly mom (my wonderful cousin, Donna Martin) of 3 teens what her best tool in her spiritual parenting toolbelt was.

Her answer surprised me.

She said it’s praying specific topical Scriptures for her teens.
The reason, she explained, is that she knew even if she couldn’t get through to her teens on a subject, she knew she could always get through to God. 

WOW!  That’s true of toddlers, teens, and in between isn’t it?!

Quick example:  You know your child is struggling with (or will encounter) peer pressure.  Look up the topic “Peer Pressure” in Parenting with Scripture: a Topical Guide for Teachable Moments.  There you will find Exodus 23:2 and can reword it as a prayer.  “Dear Lord, please help Sarah not follow the crowd in doing wrong.”

What topic do you need to be in prayer about for your child?
Let’s not wait ’til we get to our wit’s end to find those related Scriptures and get prayin’!

Photo:  Zazzle Product

Being IN the moment is something I struggle with, but am diligently working on.  “Struggle with” is putting it mildly.  True confession time (cringe…I’m going to take a deep breath and share this because I know I’m not the only one!):  My struggle with anxiety and borderline OCD is intense enough to need medication.  My wise doctor made me go to counseling for it, too.

I also know I’m not the only parent that has the magnetic pull to look at the smart phone or who feels the often overwhelming burden of a never-ending to-do list.    So, let’s look at some techniques and Scripture we can use to combat that.

At first glance, some of these may seem simple and easily dismissible.
However, as with most things in life, they are easier said than done.
These are some of the helpful things I’ve learned…

1.  Stop and take deep breaths, several times a day.

“Be still and know that I am God.”  Psalm 46:10

2.  Take a few minutes each day to free yourself from all distraction and clear your head. 
This can look different for everyone, depending on what’s most helpful for you.  For me, one of my “refreshments” is walking my dogs. The fresh air does me good and it reminds me that there’s a world outside all the other things I’m trying to get done.  It is a fight to keep from immediately turning on the podcasts I love listening to during the walks.  But, I make myself spend at least the first few minutes taking those deep breaths and just clearing my head.  Sometimes, I enjoy using the rest of the walk lifting things up to the Lord in prayer as they pop into my mind.   When I don’t have as much time, I find that even a few minutes on my patio accomplishes the same thing.  What’s your refreshment?

“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?  Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life.”   Matthew 6:26-27

3.  Be conscious of being IN the moment. 
The beauty is in the simplicity of this.  Whenever I am feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or distracted, I remind myself to take another deep break and enjoy the moment I’m IN!  Even though it seems so obvious, this is a newer technique for me and is truly helping decrease my stress level and increasing joy in life.

This is the day which the Lord has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it.  Psalm 118:24
(To me, this is the Biblical version of “stop and smell the roses.”)

4.  Stay off the smart phone as much as possible.
I was going to write, “Stay off the smart phone when others are around” but broadened it because of how I’ve seen my phone to distract my brain in general.    Not being glued to our phone makes it easy to appreciate the bigger moments with our kids.  However, when my kids are all grown up, I don’t want to regret that I didn’t make effort to enjoy the little moments too.

I am a work in progress with this one.  It truly is a battle for me as I can tend to be OCD with checking e-mail, FB, weather, news, etc. on my phone.  NOT the example I want to be for my kids nor a good habit for my already too distracted brain!  A resource that I’ve been working my way through that is convicting, incredibly practical, and helping me along this journey is Hands Free Mama: A Guide to Putting Down the Phone, Burning the To-Do List, and Letting Go of Perfection to Grasp What Really Matters!  by Rachel Stafford.  Dads, a mom may have written it, but we can all learn from her realizations, truths, and tips!

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.  1 Corinthians 10:13

I will not be mastered by anything.  1 Corinthians 6:12b

5.  Claim a helpful Scriptures!
I confess that distraction and stress are weakness of mine as I remember and draw from the power of these verses in this post.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
2 Corinthians 12:9

What’s your best technique for remembering to be “in the moment” with your kids?

Don’t forget to turn to your copy of
Parenting with Scripture: A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments
when different issues pop up!
Most of the verses from today are in there under a variety of topics!