Stop, look, and listen is another thing my mom did well when I had something to tell her.  Whether as a child or an adult, I can remember her often stopping what she was doing so she could give me her full attention.  Admittedly, this is not easy for me to do as a mom.  I’m a busy body and very task oriented, so it’s difficult for me to stop in the middle of something and switch gears.  However, if I know I can’t take time right then to listen adequately, I try to stop long enough to give eye contact and give my child a specific time when I will be able to listen.  Then, the trick is remembering to follow-up!  Another thing I have to work at being conscious of is that what may be important in a child’s world is not always the same as what I think is important.  For example, I couldn’t care less about Star Wars, but that’s one of my son’s current love languages.  🙂  Not that I haven’t nodded and said “hm….interesting” my fair share.  But, I’ve also noticed it brings him joy when I stop what I’m doing, look at him, and listen to his stories of other galaxies.

“It’s up to each parent to use eye contact to convey unconditional love.”  Dr. Ross Campbell in How to Really Love Your Child
This book has two great chapters called “How to Show Love through Eye Contact” and “How to Show Love through Focused Attention” that detail just how powerful the act of  stopping, looking, and listening can be in parenting.

“My dear brothers, take note of this:  Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”  James 1:19

Happy Mother’s Day weekend!
I have compiled a list of Preschool Boredom Busters that I hope will be helpful to those of you who have little ones in your lives.  Click on the picture below (or go to the “Download” section of www.parentingwithscripture.com) and download/print four pages full of PWS Boredom Buster sample-topic pws_15_fab_verses_outlines1fun and easy ideas!

It’s been a joy to reflect on all those things that I heard growing up that are now coming out of my mouth!
I hope it’s caused you to think of a few gems of your own.  If you did, take a moment to tell your mom how thankful you are for those sayings that you are passing along to your children.  I don’t mean to be dramatic, but do this today while you are thinking about it.  I say that because my precious mom went to be with the Lord a couple of years ago.  I wish with all my heart that I could call her up and thank her specifically for these things I’ve been blogging about.  So, for those of you who are blessed to still have your moms around, take this opportunity to share with her how those little phrases stuck with you and how you are now driving your kids crazy with them!  Oops, did I say that?  I meant to say “share how you are now imparting the same wise word on them.”  😉

“I thank my God every time I remember you.”  Philippians 1:3 

I am of the opinion that every close friend or family needs a cheery mylar balloon if he or she is in the hospital.  Flowers are great, but people can be sensitive to certain types.  Flowers can also get expensive if you do this often.  So, my pick for a hospital room is always a single mylar balloon with an encouraging note attached.  I keep the note short and sweet because if I’m not delivering the balloon myself, I’m having to dictate the message to the employee by phone.  It usually goes something like, “Happy Baby Days! or Get Well!   Love, hugs, and prayers!  The Durbins”  Most hospital flower shops will stock mylar balloons and deliver them to the rooms, same day for free.   Balloons are a fun way to let people know you care and inexpensive way to brighten up an impersonal hospital room.

To extend this idea and help your family remember to pray for the recipient of the hospital balloon, blow up a latex balloon (keep a stash for this purpose), write the person’s name on it, and keep it somewhere where in the house where it will be seen frequently.  Encourage your family members to lift up a prayer for the hospital friend every time they catch sight of the balloon.  Though this balloon is not helium, it can be symbolic of lifting up someone in prayer.
Tip – Use a dry erase marker to write on the balloon instead of a permanent marker.  Believe it or not, it will be less likely to smudge off when the balloon starts shrinking!  We learned this fun fact from a balloon artist.

“Pray continually.”   1 Thessalonians 5:17 

This isn’t one specific thing Mom said over and over, but the manner in which she would always bring verbal encouragement to people…

The art of “gushing!”

Mom was a master at going beyond a simple compliment and knowing how to sincerely gush over something.   Somehow she knew just the thing to say to make friends, family, and strangers alike feel good.  Recently, my niece was reminiscing about how she loved to go show off her new school supplies to her Grandmama (my mom) because she could go on and on like no other about what nice selections were made, how organized everything was, how she loved the colors, etc.  Mom managed to carry this out without a hint of superficiality because it truly came from her sweet heart.  If Mom noticed a store clerk was kind, she would tell the person specifically what that meant to her or how much she appreciated it.  If she noticed beautiful curls on a lady in front of her in line, she’d tell her in such a lovely way that I’m sure the lady was on cloud nine the rest of the day.    I can’t say I’m as good at it as Mom was, but I’m trying.  When I think of an encouragement or compliment and am tempted to just let the moment pass, I remember Mom’s example and go ahead and start gushing…and am usually blessed by the effort!

To extend this to parenting, I know Mom’s sincere gushing did wonders for my self-esteem and character building.
So in parenting my children, I try to gush about as many positives as often as I can.

 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.   1 Thessalonians 5:11

Once again, graphic artist Laura Williams has done an amazing job!
She has designed a beautifully whimsical “Parenting with Scripture” themed wallpaper that is now available for free downloading.

Click on the picture below.  Or, go to www.parentingwithscripture.com and look under the “Downloads” tab along the top.
Under the section “Proverbs 31:26 Wallpaper,” you’ll find multiple image size options for downloading.
Sizes include options for different screen resolutions as well as iPhones and iPads.
Enjoy!

“Blame it on me!”

When I was dating in high school, there was a boy I wasn’t comfortable with who asked me on a date.  It wasn’t an issue of whether the boy was ok to date.  He would have been on the “approved” dating list by my parents.  I just felt insecure about going out with him.  Mom knew that and much to my relief, she gave me the perfect out…”Blame it on me!”  Clearly that phrase stuck in my head because it was so meaningful to me.  Even though I haven’t had an occassion to use it yet, it’s definitely floating around in my brain ready to go when the need arises!

Thought of anything your mom said to you that you are now saying to your kids?  Please share!

Now available for free downloading:
15 Fabulous Verses to Memorize & Fun Scripture Memorization Methods

To find them, go to www.parentingwithscripture.com and click on the tab, “Downloads.”  There you can choose what you want to print.

The same information is in the back of the new version of the Parenting with Scripture.  However, the downloads have been created so that you can print them for easier reference.  I keep the verses posted on my fridge.  And thanks to my talented graphic designer, Laura Williams, the downloads look amazing!

In keeping with the subtitle of the book, A Topical Guide for Teachable Moments, I selected these 15 verses as ones that stand out because they are usable for a high frequency of common teachable moments.  If you’re needing a place to start for hiding God’s Word in your heart, this is a simple and applicable way.

“Just smile and be nice!” 

This one is so helpful in numerous situations for me even now and my kids!
When someone is being really annoying…”Just smile and be nice!”
When you’re having to wait because someone in front of you in line is taking forever…”Just smile and be nice!”
…You get the picture!

Share your “momisms” with us by commenting below!

“A happy heart makes the face cheerful!” Proverbs 15:13

“Adapt!”

Oh my goodness, that one brings back memories!  I’m not known for being the most flexible person so there were innumerable times growing up when I would be circumstantially thrown off the “planned” course for the day and Mom would simply say, “Adapt!”  Merriam-Webster’s Student Dictionary defines adapt as “to change so as to fit a new or specific use or situation.”  Usually that change needed to happen in my attitude.  And so it goes with my kids.  When a friend can’t come over as planned…”Adapt!”  When it’s raining when we were supposed to go to the park…”Adapt!”  Truth be told, I’m saying it as much for my benefit as theirs!

It comforts me to know that in this world of change, there is one thing that will never change…
“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”  Hebrews 13:8

Hearing your mom’s words echo in your head?  Please share!